A thunderclap and the world changes. It’s all a haze, something she didn’t bother to notice until now. Their words are whispers, growing ever louder as they press their feelings on her, as they wonder where she went to and if she’s ever coming home.

There are parts and pieces, halves broken into smaller chunks that all war against one another. She is home, she is never home, they were never hers, she is only deluding herself. Anything they could say to her are thoughts she already formulated, but they don’t stick – she just doesn’t care. There’s a fire burning away all the things she ever was or could be, and it’s cleansing.

There’s the collateral damage…there’s the other, her secret, nonchalant and too far away to tell. And the one who never speaks and won’t open his mouth to state his pain, even though she feels it, bright as fire. And then there’s the blame, the abandonment, all unnecessary. There’s her resentment, staring at her with narrowed eyes and a sharp tone.

Part of her wants to scream and the other part is full of unearthly calm. She let herself fall below, and when she fell there was nothing left but the darkness of the lack of hope she had cultivated. He fell into her, and she let herself take him as deep as he was willing to go.

There is a fire here, burning away all the things she ever was or could be. What lies after the ashes have settled is something new and extravagant and…effulgent. Something bright with the promise of a life of no more freefalling.

She wanted an out. She got it.